Don't feel that if you've failed in the past with addiction recovery, relapsed or have broken promises to yourself over and over again about change that it is hopeless. Life can bring many difficult situations including relationship traumas, financial losses, separation from children, physical injuries and family of origin flashbacks. Sometimes drug and alcohol abuse is from past memories and not even current situations. Things can eat at us and circumstances may break our hearts. Then we carry this hurt into family life and new problems arise.
It sounds cliche, but each day can be a new start. When you catch yourself falling into self-hatred, self-blame or anger at yourself, just tell yourself gently that you don't want to feed those negative thoughts anymore. The mind can be our greatest friend or enemy. Don't beat yourself again saying how you always are at fault. Be aware that all these buzz words like loser, jerk or failure are just part of your past conditioning and you don't need them anymore.
We like to numb the pain because we aren't sure what else to do. This can be by getting high, alcohol indulgence intoxication or prescription drug abuse. Face the pain is the first step and by doing this it actually gets easier. We run from pain but it is only an emotion. Once you realize you can sit with it then you are on the way to getting stronger with the support of an inpatient rehab program for drugs or alcohol or an outpatient support group for addiction. Let 2009 be the year to let go of the past habits and usher in the true you that you long to recover. Gaining yourself is the best recovery.
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